It is with great sadness that I must report the death of the United States Constitution.
The Constitution was born in Philadelphia, and went through a number of growth spurts. In 1920 the Constitution suffered a severe illness called “Prohibition” and didn’t recover until 1933. After this, the Constitution suffered a severe and prolonged beating at the hands of one Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
The Constitution never fully healed from that assault, although many fine people tried to nurse this famed document back to health. One of the most notable was a man known as Ronald Wilson Reagan.
After Mr. Reagan passed on, the Constitution continued fighting for it’s life. Finally, on March 23rd, 2010, The Constitution died.
The Constitution did not die a natural death, but was brutally murdered. This was an actual conspiracy led by a man named Obama with his cohorts Pelosi and Reid. There was some hope that the Constitution would be able to fight off this vicious attack with the help of a man named Stupak. Unfortunately it turned out that this man was working with the evil troika all along and was in fact the person who dealt our beloved Document the mortal blow.
At approximately 11:30am EST Barack Obama pulled the plug on the life support system. The constitution expired shortly afterwords.
Please bow your heads in prayer for the loss of one of the finest documents ever born.
~The Angry Webmaster~
