Saturday morning....about 8 or 9...you're sleeping peacfully. And then, the phone rings. You lay there for a minute, thinking, "eh, I'll let it ring." But, you can't help it. What if it's important, what if a friend needs your help? So, you hop out of bed and stumble to the phone.
And they're off! You can't get a word in edge wise as they start on their page long script all about why you should switch your long distance plan, subscribe to this or that, buy a credit card...ENOUGH! It's ridiculous. Maybe they're up at 6am for work, but I am a student, and weekends are my only time to actually get some sleep. I do not need some solicitor calling me during the wee hours of morning. Not to mention dinner time. I want to eat, not talk on the phone.
Maybe I could deal with it if they didn't pronounce my last name wrong EVERY time. I do not understand this! My name is not that difficult. I mean, I try to be polite, "no thank you" or "not interested" used to finish the job. Now, it's "oh, is there another family member I can speak to about this wonderful opportunity?" or, "ok, I'll call back at another time!" I think these calls should be considered harassment, and outlawed. This is what magazines, newspapers, and the internet are for. Post your ads somewhere else, cause NO ONE wants to be bothered at home for some stupid long distance plan! We are happy with the ones we have! If we weren't we'd change them!
Fucking worthless Do Not Call list, typical of the government to tell us, Yep, we've solved that problem. NOT!!Now these subhuman pond scum slime telemarketers can call you all they want if they use pre-recorded messages. ALL they want. So now when I come home my answering machine light is blinking FULL and it is one or two messages from these assholes who somehow think that doing this will make me want to buy their cheap, useless, overpriced crap. Not hardly!
I am soo damn angry at these vile telemarketers. I am getting up to 8 or 9 calls each day and sometimes in the evening when I am trying to feed or bath my baby son. There was one indian sounding guy who kept pestering me to buy a mobile phone and when I TRIED to explain that I am happy with the phone I already have, he kept saying 'what madam? what madam?' like he can't understand me. When I hung up he called back straight away like some kind of rampant pest. It's become so bad I don't even answer the phone anymore. I have to screen all my calls which is such a hassle. If I wasn't such a nice person, I'd blow an airhorn down the phone and burst their eardrums!
*Note from Anger Central
The Webmaster has a rather unique way of dealing with these slime balls. He hands the phone to his wife and lets her talk with them. "I'm sorry. I am Chinese. My English is no good. Bye Bye!"
Here is what happens to me pretty much EVERY afternoon when i come home.
Get home, start to sit down and relax.
* grumble grumble *
Get up to answer the phone.
'Hello, I am informing you missus that you have one a ONE-WEEK ALL EXPENSES PAID TRIP TO BALI. Please give me your credit card number.'
Slams phone down angrily, curses telemarketers.
This has to stop. It's driving me INSANE!!! WHO THE HELL WOULD GIVE THEM YOUR CREDIT CARD NUMBER ANYWAY? That telemarketing statement back there basically translates as:
'Give me your credit card number so I can SCAM THE FUCK OUT OF YOU AND MAKE SURE YOUR LIVING OFF CENTERLINK FOR THE REST OF YOUR FUCKING LIFE!'
Honestly, these people are probably living off $10 a day in India, and that's the only thing that can feed them; I TRY to remain calm, but... sometimes my anger just gets the better of me. Another scenario is...
'Good Afternoon, madam, may I persuade you to take advantage of
this fabulous offer of a ...'
(telemarketer is talking so fast that there is no gap in the conversation to say that you don't really give a sh*t.)
'Sorry, man, I'm not interested.'
'But this is a once in a lifetime opportunity....'
I slam the phone down again.
Bloody hell. Telemarketers = Bane of my existence.
They call my mobile phone every day and waste a lot of time. Many times the calls are automated and eat up my minutes. I've asked to placed on the do not call list and they still keep calling me.
*Note from Anger Central
Assuming you are in the U.S., it's illegal for telemarketers to call a cell phone. You can take action against the company that hired them. Talk to a lawyer.
I am so angry I could just blow the phone off the wall and into the twentieth dimension. These telemarketers and spam nuts call all the time. The ASPCA calls only after 8 pm every night. Microsoft trouble idiots call everyday to tell me my computer is trying to phone home. Then a call about me promising to send money to some organization I never herd of.
Money for cops, money for firefighters, money for cancer, money for the common cold. How about some money for me? Give me a break.
The phone company will not or can not help. My options are limited. I am climbing the wall. Everyone I know is dead, so the very few calls I get are important to me. So keep your calls to yourself. If you telemarketers would take NO for an answer and hang up, it would not be so bad. I tell you NO, because I do not need a pap smear. I do not want your back brace and or knee brace. My computer is not trying to call home. I do not have any relatives in jail seeking bail.
Now you made me go out and spend another $100.00 dollars on top
of the outrageous phone bill. Just so I can receive a call that I might be
Now I have a call blocker you pukes. Now have your machine call my machine and get hung up on.
Now after a week the blocker is trashing calls left and right. I realize that everyone I know is dead. I think I might need the telemarketers now..
Ahhhhhhhhh..Gads I am going crazy.
Thanks for the opportunity to scream.
So, here I am trying to figure out why in the ever-loving fuck I still have a landline phone in my house and pay for this 'service' when all it does is serve as a means for fucking harassment.
Seriously, all fucking day, every day, like clockwork, these fucking morons keep calling and filling up my fucking voicemail with stupid fucking bullshit. 90% of the time it's a fucking robocall and not an actual person on the other end of it. Whoever invented that fucking shit and first implemented it to spam people's fucking phones must be a goddamned sociopath through and through. Not only can they call you all fucking day, they don't even have to pay an actual fucking person to call you anymore.
The only calls I EVER get on my landline phone are as follows:
1. Fucking morons trying to sell me shit. Shit that I don't need, don't want, can't afford, shit that has no use for me whatsoever. I am a 24 year old fucking man. Why are you trying to sell me a fucking Life Alert system over the goddamned phone? Why are you calling me about diabetic socks and blood sugar tests and cheaper prescriptions? I suffer from none of those ailments and I don't take any fucking prescriptions at the current time. I already have a fucking vacuum cleaner and a carpet sweeper. I don't need a fucking security system. I live in the middle of bumfuck and the crime rate is pretty low here. Aside from that, my security system is a Mosin-Nagant 91-30 with bayonet affixed that leans against the wall in the corner. My back-up is a 9mm handgun. I don't need a fucking security system. Stop fuckin' calling me and get a real fucking job doing something productive, you know, something that society needs.
2. Political calls trying to get me to vote for some fuckstick running for senate, Congress, what the fuck ever. Always with fake messages recorded from the candidate. Yeah, I don't believe for a fucking millisecond that Big Don Trump is calling me to ask me to vote for him. I pretty much vote R the whole way down the ballot because fuck the democratic party and their pandering and their shit candidates like Hillary "Oughta Be In Guantanamo" Clinton. I already know who I'm voting for, fuck off please.
3. Shitbags from India trying to scam me out of my fucking money. Yeah, I don't believe for a fucking second that your name is actually "Mike Smith", your real name is Habib and you're sitting in a call center in fucking Mumbai or somewhere. I'd know if my computer had a goddamned virus and if it did I wouldn't need you to fucking fix it for me. I've been doing IT related work for years. Then they switch up their tactics and act like they're the fuckin' FBI or some shit and want me to pay ransom money for 'outstanding warrants' or some bullshit. The FBI doesn't fucking call you and ask nicely for money to clear shit up. If they want you for something, they'll send you a goddamned letter or kick your fuckin' door in. Quit calling me, motherfuckers. That's your fucking job? To call old people and convince them of bullshit and take their money? Well I ain't falling for it, fuckheads. I might be dumb as a box of rocks but I'm still smarter than the average bear.
4. Debt Collectors. Very few of these calls I get are from them, but I don't understand who came up with the business model of debt collection. Calling someone repeatedly, day after fucking day, all hours, and filling up their voicemail with dumb fucking messages will not make them pay you. It will not somehow manifest more money into their fucking bank account or wallet. You can't get blood out of a turnip. It doesn't fucking work on me. If I have to choose between having electricity or eating a hot meal and paying that fucking overdue 90 dollar doctor bill from 6 months ago, well, I think you can guess who I'm gonna fuckin' pay. You'll get your goddamned money, don't worry. Unless you're calling me to offer me a fuckin' job, fuck off. That's the only way that you bastards calling me could conceivably make me gain more money. Get a real fuckin' job you fucking idiots. That was your calling in life? To be a shitbag over the phone and punch numbers in and shake down people for fucking money? Fuck off.
5. Wrong number people, or people calling for people that don't fuckin' live here anymore. I don't mind the wrong number people, that's an honest mistake. But for you dumbfuck companies that keep calling me asking for 'Jan' or 'Margaret' or fuckin' 'DAVE' or whoever, when I pick up the phone, do I sound like fuckin' Jan or Margaret? Do I sound like fuckin' Cindy Lou-Who? I'm a 245 pound blue collar dude that drives trucks. I ain't who you're fuckin' lookin' for. Can you guess my name? It sure the fuck ain't Dave, not even close. Same shit with the fuckin' post office, giving me mail for Hank or Steve. I'm not either of them and I sure the fuck don't want Steve's bills. I got enough bills of my fuckin' own. Eat shit.
Soon as I get my cell phone turned back on, which will hopefully be soon, I'm doing away with that fucking landline phone and it'll give me the greatest of pleasure to yank that fuckin' cord out of the wall and not have to listen to you dumb cunts crowding up my voicemail and the goddamned constant ringing. Alexander Graham Bell did not invent the fucking telephone for you goddamned cunts to harass and scam people. Quit playing on my phone and fuck off. It's even more annoying when I'm actually expecting a fuckin' call for a job interview or from a temp agency. Fuck off and get a real job you troglodyte fucks. You need to stop and feel bad. Feel bad about your empty shit-end life and remember your dead fucking dreams and your unfulfilled goals.
*Note from Anger Central
The Webmaster maintains a VOIP style "Land line" due to costs. The service he uses is dirt cheap, and if he has t make calls to support services, he uses that. Why run up the cell phone bill?. He also uses Google Voice as his primary number and has that route calls to both his mobile and land line phones. When a spam call comes in on that number, he blocks it and lists it as spam.
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