I am angry at everyone. Everyone in general. The plummeting of our society into an abyss of text messages and Twitter updates. The values and priorities of people today are so completely fucked beyond belief. The worst part about it? I've spent two fucking years over here in Afghanistan to protect and support you small-minded fucks. Don't get me wrong, I completely acknowledge your freedom to be a shitbag hypnotized by the next touch-phone or celebrity gossip update. But that doesn't mean I support your patheticness.
Take last year for example. Everyone remembers where they were the day the king of fucking pop, Michael Jackson died. Guess where I was? At a fucking funeral for two servicemen who were KIA. Did those two heroes make their way to your nightly news? Fuck no. Whose face was plastered on magazine covers across the world? A fucking entertainer. He fucking ENTERTAINED you people. While those two badasses who were blown the fuck up protected that entertainers right to cut and mutilate his fucking face so he could look different. How fucking shallow are we? Are we that shallow that we support someone so vain and plastic that they have to change their face?
And how about celebrities in general? All the Kim Kardashians, all the Paris Hiltons. What in the flying fuck have you contributed to society? Are you even educated? Beyond a pair of tits and legs and an enthusiasm for sucking dick on camera, do you have a talent that improves and inspires other people around you? Fuck no. Didn't think so. The worst part about it is that todays youth eats that shit right up. Eats it right the fuck up. But when I had to put my team leader on a plane home with his coffin draped in an American flag, that never made it to your newsstands or wireless updates did it? No fucking respect, no acknowledgement, no awareness.
Liberal pussies can all suck my dick. Quit being such pussies. How can your father be proud of you? Oh, because you're all for "equality" and "spreading the wealth around". Fuck that shit. Take your cup of Starbucks and your horn-rimmed glasses and skinny jeans and get the fuck out of here.
And I so help me God if I get home and I see another douchebag running around with mommy and daddy's credit card buying up all the Hollister and Abercrombie clothes he lays eyes on. Match that with a fitted baseball cap and a pencil-thin mustache and you've just mimicked every other toolbag in middle America. And God forbid you're wearing a set of fake dog tags that you got at some fucking kiosk at the mall.
Oh, and I never want to hear the words "Jersey Shore" again. Give me a fucking break. Is that shit even real? Is that what I've been missing out on these last two years in Afghanistan? Maybe I'll just fucking stay over here until everyones brains rot out and it's safe to come home. Jersey fucking Shore. If I wanted to see a bunch of baboons, I'd open up a Nat Geo magazine like the rest of society needs to.
Fuck off everyone.
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