Louisiana

I'm gonna try extra hard to keep this rant directed at the state itself and not the rest of the South or the U.S., no matter how difficult it may be to confine it. *takes deep breath* I had spent three semesters on a fellowship in America in southern Louisiana and I have to say, as somebody who has never visited the U.S. before, I have been given a very shitty first impression by choosing to come down here.

What pissed me off so much? Total cultural ignorance, to begin with. I almost started to tear my hair out after so many people asked "What part of Latin America are you from?" after I told them I was Spanish! As in from Spain, the country in Western Europe? Worse yet were the idiots who, lacking in even a basic knowledge of their own language, kept trying to argue that since I had light brown hair and fair skin that I was most definitely not "Hispanic." I don't know if it's even worth trying to explain to such a person the notions of nationality, race, culture, and the idea that some Spanish-speaking people consider themselves white.

I think it is even more ironic I find this here because Louisiana likes to hold itself as a place of greater social and cultural diversity than the rest of the American South, apparently since munching on poorly seasoned insects (crawfish) and holding some kind of weak ties to French heritage makes them slightly more exotic than the rest of middle America.

And therein I think lies the state's biggest problem: pride. The standard of living here is, compared to the rest of the country, absolute shit. Poverty is rampant, wages are a complete joke (no surprise that Louisiana's best and brightest usually head to greener pastures after college, though the govt. is totally baffled by this), the schools are beyond lousy, and legislature loves to keep slapping on some of the highest consumer tax rates in the country to beat back any demonic notions of commerce trying to come in and expand. Yet for some unbelevable reason, people are proud to live here. And most often these are the types of people who have 1. never lived in any other region of the country (much less a different country entirely) and 2. never had any ambitions to move anywhere else to look for a better way of life. These people feel comfortable only with the only things they know and hate and fear anything outside that clearly-defined cultural zone they've set for themselves. They see ignorance as a virtue and apparently don't seem to understand that people and things don't necessarily have to fulfill whatever ideas their own closed-off way of thinking have developed (see 2nd paragraph for case in point). Maybe I'm just being arrogant, but I see something deeply wrong with the idea of wallowing in your own mediocrity and writing off the fact that everyone thinks your home region is a shithole without doing a damn thing to improve it or your own life.

LOUSYANA Laws 2

I swear to GOD - if I can ever afford to get out of this horrible little third world state, I will. *Anywhere* in the U.S. HAS to be better than the state of Louisiana (Lousyana). I contracted this *asshole* I thought I could trust into doing a job for me (he did work for me in the past with no problems) - paid him in advance ... have a receipt stating this .. and the %&@#$ cops won't do SHIT about it, because it's under $500 and "not considered a criminal, but civil matter". In order to sue the bastard for MY MONEY .. I'd have to hand over $100 to file a suit in small claims court! What the fuck?! Whatever happened with "to SERVE AND PROTECT"??

This state is shit, MOST of the people who live here are shit, the laws are absolute shit and bassackwards - I'm sick of being trapped here. And for future reference, if any of you little slimebag "handymen" knock on MY door, don't be surprised if I automatically tell you to fuck off. If I can't even trust the one who worked for me for several years - I'm certainly not going to give you the time of day. I'll do it myself. One more thing. For anyone considering moving to the state of Louisiana - DON'T. You'll be VERY sorry you did.

Louisiana 3

This is shit hole state of the USA. Specifically the Southeastern quadrant of the state. Uneducated free-loaders abound. Crack whores, thugs, and excessive criminal activity of all types. AVOID THIS area of the country. It isn't safe and it stinks. 300 hundred years of shit and piss and vomit in the streets. It reeks all the time. Did mention the really uneducated masses that are too 'stoopid' for anything but being on welfare and trying to mug you or killing people. I don't care if Mardi Gras is the biggest party, I have seen people stabbed, shot, and beaten too many times to count. Your chances of being injured while in Southeast Louisiana are really high. Plus, there are floods and hurricanes, which never seem to wash the scum out of there. It just floats around til the deluge subsides and starts all over again. People live in constant fear for their lives and there are many places to avoid within the city. I will make it easier and say stay away all together. Louisiana sucks and I am glad I don't live there anymore.

New Orleans 4

I completed my dissertation in Social Anthropology at Tulane in the late 90's so I know a thing or two about the situation in New Orleans. The most glaring thing is the backwater mentality of people in New Orleans. You guys are some of the laziest, most corrupt, insular people I've ever come across (and I've been everywhere).

Let me illustrate this. Imagine, for a moment, that the following scenarios unfolding one by one: you get raped by a drunken cop during a traffic stop; your property taxes mysteriously increase by 400% after you get into a fender-bender with the city housing commissioner; you finally realize that the only good-paying white-collar jobs in your city are filled by fourth- and fifth-generation La. or New Orleans residents so dynastic that they make the Kennedys look open and diverse by comparison. If your response is to shrug and lift a glass of Southern Comfort in salute with the rallying cry of, “Well, y’all can love it or leave it!” congratulations, you have simultaneously proved that your IQ is 20 points lower than the national average and that your personality, diction, and outlook on life make you an optimal fit for the Crescent City.

You pretend to have an art scene when in fact all you have is a few drunken, tattooed weirdos who sling dishes or pour drinks from 4 - midnight then scribble a few lines on canvas before going off to the Abbey to blow their tips on 2 for 1 pina coladas and black tar heroin. Come to New York and I'll show you art (though I'm not sure that you'll 'get it').

You kid yourselves into believing that rolling a mystery meat product in flour, frying it in oil, and overloading it with pepper and garlic is culinary genius. Here in New York we call that . . .well, shit. And a cheap way to make shitty, unhealthy, low-grade food taste semi-palatable. Again, come to NYC and I'll wake you out of that fantasy.

Your "city" stinks, most of you are indolent, illiterate, violent, gun-happy, nihilistic barbarians, and 99.9% of you have a substance abuse problem. You ARE the weakest link in the US and I'm not so sure that we should be focusing our tax dollars on your 'cultural' insolence.