{"id":14548,"date":"2014-04-01T14:25:56","date_gmt":"2014-04-01T18:25:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=14548"},"modified":"2016-09-21T12:35:49","modified_gmt":"2016-09-21T16:35:49","slug":"epa-to-regulate-human-flatulence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=14548","title":{"rendered":"EPA to regulate Human Flatulence"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Good day all. As you may have heard, the EPA is looking to regulate methane gas generated by cows. I have just found out that a new series of regulations from the EPA has been published that will affect every man, woman and child in America.<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>Due to increasing levels of methane, a known greenhouse gas, the EPA has put forward the following regulations.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>All persons shall from April 1, 2014, seek dietary advice from EPA certified dieticians on what types of food they may consume in order to reduce emissions of methane gas brought about by the digestive process. Food products known to generate high levels of methane are hereby banned as of April 1, 2014. Possession of prohibited items shall be punished with imprisonment of not less then three years and fines not to exceed $10000,00 per incident.<\/li>\n<li>All person shall henceforth be required to wear a gas capture device 24 hours a day. The contents shall be stored in an approves container until it can be recovered for proper disposal. Failure to wear the EPA approved device shall be punishable by a fine of not less then $5000 per incident and not more then three years imprisonment.<\/li>\n<li>In order to enforce these new regulations a new enforcement arm of the EPA shall be formed with the power to exam individuals and buildings to ensure compliance with the federal regulations. Physical examinations are authorized. The new Agency shall be known as the Federal Agency for the Recovery of Transients Involving Gasses and shall have full powers of arrest and remediation.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>The regulations were proposed last year, but slipped in below the radar due to all the scandals and the Obamacare roll out debacle. Because of this, no one knew about the new regulations until they went active last night at 12:01AM Eastern Time. Congress certainly wasn\u2019t aware of this latest outrage by the Obama EPA, and it may be to late to do anything about it. I don\u2019t know where we can get the \u201cOfficial Methane Gas recovery systems\u201d but will let you know as soon as I find out.<\/p>\n<p>I did see a small blurb from Debbie Wasserman Schultz saying that this will be a great boon to America. I\u2019ve also read that Nancy Pelosi\u2019s family has won the contract to manufacture the Gas Recovery garments, (Nicknamed Fart Bags) and that they will be sold at clothing stores around the country. However, Walmart has been told they will not be permitted to sell the items due to their anti-labor stance. Idiocy like this is why we need to clean out congress. Call you congressman and tell them that they need to stop these EPA abuses now!<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/03\/suck-it-up-Buttercup.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-14458\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/03\/suck-it-up-Buttercup-300x300.jpg?resize=177%2C177\" alt=\"suck it up Buttercup\" width=\"177\" height=\"177\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/03\/suck-it-up-Buttercup.jpg?resize=300%2C300&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/03\/suck-it-up-Buttercup.jpg?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/03\/suck-it-up-Buttercup.jpg?w=400&amp;ssl=1 400w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 177px) 100vw, 177px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Thatisall<\/p>\n<p><i><b>~The Angry Webmaster~<\/b><\/i><\/p>\n<p>[yasr_visitor_votes size=&#8221;medium&#8221;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Good day all. As you may have heard, the EPA is looking to regulate methane gas generated by cows. I have just found out that a new series of regulations from the EPA has been published that will affect every man, woman and child in America. <a href=\"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=14548\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[43,6,100,71,115,219,35],"tags":[11,44,6,90,101,34],"class_list":["post-14548","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-global-warming","category-humor","category-moonbat","category-news-of-the-day","category-stupidity-crime","category-the-good-idea-fairy","category-tyranny","tag-america","tag-globull-worming","tag-humor","tag-moonbattery","tag-news","tag-stupidity"],"views":1722,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":22246,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=22246","url_meta":{"origin":14548,"position":0},"title":"Flatulence now illegal in California","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"September 21, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. If you have ever been around cows, you know they do one thing very well. Pass gas. Blow out huge amounts of flatulence. In other words, they fart up a storm. California, home of the dumbest people on Earth, don\u2019t like the fact that cows fart. It\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Global Warming&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Global Warming","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=43"},"img":{"alt_text":"danger science","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/danger-science-300x288.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":15954,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=15954","url_meta":{"origin":14548,"position":1},"title":"The Progressive agenda of the EPA","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"September 16, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. In a series of emails that have no become public, the EPA has been shown not trying to protect the environment, but pushing the \u201cProgressive\u201d agenda down Americans throats.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Crime&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Crime","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=3"},"img":{"alt_text":"something-smells-fishy-and-it-certainly-isnt-fish","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/06\/something-smells-fishy-and-it-certainly-isnt-fish-300x225.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":40385,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=40385","url_meta":{"origin":14548,"position":2},"title":"EPA moves to destroy the energy sector","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"May 22, 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. If there is a department that has long since outlived it\u2019s usefulness, it\u2019s the Environmental Protection Agency. The EPA has, over the decades, assumed authority it was never given, and, until recently, has been allowed to get away with. That came to an end when the Supreme\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Economy&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Economy","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=176"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.pinimg.com\/originals\/74\/e0\/e5\/74e0e559d01d9ff545e998e8ebf67e5c.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":7166,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=7166","url_meta":{"origin":14548,"position":3},"title":"And the EPA strikes back!","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"March 27, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"With all the news happening today, I\u2019m sure this one will slip under the radar and no one will notice until the lights go out. What\u2019s happened this time? The EPA has once again exceeded it\u2019s authority and is imposing Carbon caps on power plants.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Global Warming&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Global Warming","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=43"},"img":{"alt_text":"Energy, Jobs, Politics","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/RAMFnlclr-112111-keystone-I.jpg.cms_.jpeg?fit=800%2C575&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/RAMFnlclr-112111-keystone-I.jpg.cms_.jpeg?fit=800%2C575&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/RAMFnlclr-112111-keystone-I.jpg.cms_.jpeg?fit=800%2C575&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/RAMFnlclr-112111-keystone-I.jpg.cms_.jpeg?fit=800%2C575&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":29564,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=29564","url_meta":{"origin":14548,"position":4},"title":"EPA threatens Kalifornistan for their crappy air quality","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"October 4, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. In the \u201cJust Desserts\u201d department, we have the Environmental Protection Agency telling Kalifornistan that their air quality is bad and that they need to clean up their collectivist act if they want to keep getting my tax money. For decades, Kalifornistan has been imposing their ideas of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Economy&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Economy","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=176"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.pinimg.com\/originals\/8b\/e5\/30\/8be530d21c9946d8a5d896334f30a500.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":17575,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=17575","url_meta":{"origin":14548,"position":5},"title":"Give me BBQ or give me DEATH!","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"March 26, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. Last week news came out that the Environmental Protection Agency was looking at regulating backyard barbeque grills. Unfortunately for the EPA, someone spotted their secret plans and raised the flag of rebellion.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Moonbat&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Moonbat","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=100"},"img":{"alt_text":"Gadsden_flag","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/Gadsden_flag-300x199.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14548","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=14548"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14548\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":22249,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14548\/revisions\/22249"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=14548"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=14548"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=14548"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}