{"id":16586,"date":"2014-12-03T13:43:59","date_gmt":"2014-12-03T18:43:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=16586"},"modified":"2020-10-17T07:40:04","modified_gmt":"2020-10-17T11:40:04","slug":"cant-drive-a-stick-dont-steal-a-car-with-a-standard-transmission","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=16586","title":{"rendered":"Can\u2019t drive a stick? Don\u2019t steal a car with a standard transmission"},"content":{"rendered":"

Good day all. We have another chapter of \u201cStupid Criminals in the News!\u201d today. It seems that a couple of idiots thought it would be a great idea to carjack someone\u2019s car. They just ran into one tiny little problem. The car uses a standard transmission and these two geniuses only knew how to drive an automatic.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

So, what did these two disgraces to the human race do? They made the owner of the vehicle teach them how to drive a standard transmission. Here are the amusing details from Fox News<\/a>:<\/p>\n

Two Houston teens are facing charges after they carjacked a man last weekend, holding a gun to the victim’s head and forcing him to teach them how to drive the vehicle\u2019s stick shift, Click2Houston.com reported.<\/a> <\/i><\/p>\n

“The suspects were unfamiliar with the operation of a standard transmission and they tried to get the victim to show them how to drive the standard while he was being held at gunpoint,” Stefan Happ, an inspector, told the station. <\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\"Epic_Facepalm_by_RJTH\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Oh the Stoopid was strong in these two.<\/p>\n

The victim explained the stick shift, and the teens took off with the vehicle. The crash course, however, proved insufficient and the suspects were reportedly forced to abandon the car a few blocks away and flee the old-fashion way: by running.<\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\"The<\/a><\/p>\n

I wonder if these blithering idiots were wearing loafers? Somehow, I don\u2019t think they know how to tie the laces on their own shoes correctly.<\/p>\n

They were caught a short time later. “The officers were chasing the vehicle and apparently they had issues operating the vehicle,” Happ told the station. <\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\"nelson2\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Gee, ya think? I would wager that if it weren\u2019t for the use of a weapon by the little punks, they might have been able to get away due to the officer collapsing on the ground in hysterics. As it was, since these genetic failures used a weapon, they\u2019re luck they weren\u2019t shot by the police.<\/p>\n

The alleged robbers are 17 and 15 years old. The 17 year old was charged with aggravated robbery with a deadly weapon.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I don\u2019t know about the 15 year old. He may be recoverable, but the 17 year old is going to be experiencing the finer points of the Texas penal system. I don\u2019t think either one of them is going to be worrying about learning how to drive a standard any time soon.<\/p>\n

\"recovering<\/a><\/p>\n

Thatisall<\/p>\n

~The Angry Webmaster~<\/b><\/i>
\n(Who can drive both \u201c4 on the floor\u201d and \u201c3 on the tree\u201d)<\/p>\n

[yasr_visitor_votes size=”medium”]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Good day all. We have another chapter of \u201cStupid Criminals in the News!\u201d today. It seems that a couple of idiots thought it would be a great idea to carjack someone\u2019s car. They just ran into one tiny little problem. The car uses a standard transmission and these two geniuses only knew how to drive an automatic. Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[3,4,6,135,71,115,219],"tags":[3,222,6,15,34],"class_list":["post-16586","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-crime","category-entertainment","category-humor","category-just-desserts","category-news-of-the-day","category-stupidity-crime","category-the-good-idea-fairy","tag-crime","tag-good-idea-fairy","tag-humor","tag-incompetence","tag-stupidity"],"views":809,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":19819,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=19819","url_meta":{"origin":16586,"position":0},"title":"Stupid Criminal of the week #50a","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"December 10, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. A couple of days ago I listed the Stupid Criminal of the week. That knucklehead managed to get himself eaten by an alligator. I didn't expect to run into another moron so quickly. This time we have a naked carjacker.","rel":"","context":"In "Crime"","block_context":{"text":"Crime","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=3"},"img":{"alt_text":"Stupid Criminal","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/Stupid-Criminal-300x289.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":25877,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=25877","url_meta":{"origin":16586,"position":1},"title":"How not to impress a judge","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"March 10, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. It\u2019s time for another entry in the \u201cStupid Criminal of the Week!\u201d awards. This time, the criminal mastermind didn\u2019t manage to get himself killed in an interesting way. No, this one decided to show why he should be locked up and the key recycled into razor blades.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Crime"","block_context":{"text":"Crime","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=3"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/Stupid-Criminal-300x289.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":34532,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=34532","url_meta":{"origin":16586,"position":2},"title":"The CDC LIED! LIED!! about masks outside","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"May 11, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. Well, well, well, it looks like the CDC has been caught with their gloved hands in the cookie jar. It seems that their claim that the odds of catching the Kung Flu while outside at about 10% is not entirely...accurate. It seems that the actual chance of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Just Desserts"","block_context":{"text":"Just Desserts","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=135"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.pinimg.com\/originals\/79\/cf\/97\/79cf97a8a1dda3462047cc50a33ffbe8.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":18221,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=18221","url_meta":{"origin":16586,"position":3},"title":"Maryland removes parallel parking from driving test","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"June 13, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. Once again, the progressive's answer to a difficult test is to remove the question, not actually teach the answer or solution. This time, they have removed parallel parking from the driving test. Here are some of the details from Fox News: Maryland has become the most recent\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "News of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"News of the Day","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=71"},"img":{"alt_text":"The-Good-Idea-Fairy-3","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/The-Good-Idea-Fairy-3-268x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":33428,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=33428","url_meta":{"origin":16586,"position":4},"title":"RIP Parler, 2018-2021","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"January 11, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Parler went offline at around 4:15AM Eastern Standard Time. The company was flat out destroyed by a conspiracy by Big Tech. The purge of \"Enemies of the State\" by the tech giants is now underway. Thatisall ~The Very Angry Webmaster~","rel":"","context":"In "Crime"","block_context":{"text":"Crime","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=3"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.pinimg.com\/originals\/95\/b5\/9d\/95b59d66ca3f6ccb30cdaac03be586dd.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.pinimg.com\/originals\/95\/b5\/9d\/95b59d66ca3f6ccb30cdaac03be586dd.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.pinimg.com\/originals\/95\/b5\/9d\/95b59d66ca3f6ccb30cdaac03be586dd.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/i.pinimg.com\/originals\/95\/b5\/9d\/95b59d66ca3f6ccb30cdaac03be586dd.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":18502,"url":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?p=18502","url_meta":{"origin":16586,"position":5},"title":"Oregon instituting mandatory GPS tracking","author":"Angry Webmaster","date":"July 14, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Good day all. This story came out on Friday, right before Independence Day. Oregon is instituting a program to charge a tax for the miles you travel when driving. The way they plan on doing this is installing a GPS tracker into every car in the state.","rel":"","context":"In "News of the Day"","block_context":{"text":"News of the Day","link":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/?cat=71"},"img":{"alt_text":"1984-Big-Brother-Poster","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/angry.net\/blog2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/1984-Big-Brother-Poster-210x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16586","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=16586"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16586\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32110,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16586\/revisions\/32110"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=16586"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=16586"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/angry.net\/blog2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=16586"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}