Oh No! Twinkie shortages!

Good day all, this is the Angry Systems Administrator. I’ve been dealing with the nightmare of no Twinkies after Hostess went belly up. Then came the wonderful news that the Twinkie was going to come back! A few weeks ago, I saw and devoured my first Twinkie in months!

I was happy! The long dark horror of no Twinkies was over! But then I started going to the market and found that where the boxes of that glorious golden cake should be, was emptiness. I asked what was going on? Is it those union thugs again, committing another crime upon Humanity? The answer is simple if sad. Here are the details from the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette:

When Sam Guido unveiled the new line of Twinkies at Kuhn’s market in Ross last month, customers were ecstatic. “People were waiting for them to come back,” the store manager said. “I put them right in the front door just to let people know that we have them.”

And life was good.

But the new owner of the Twinkies brand concedes it has struggled to keep up with orders following the snack cake’s highly publicized rebirth last month, leading to empty shelves for some retailers, including O’Hara grocer Giant Eagle.

Withdrawal is returning! At least there are HoHo’s.

Mr. Guido’s initial delivery sold out, and despite his best efforts, his Kuhn’s store did not receive another shipment until last Saturday. Now, he says, he is out of Ho Hos — and there is no word when the next shipment will arrive.

NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

In March, private equity firms Apollo Global Management and Metropoulos & Co. purchased the business for $410 million. They planned a swift turnaround and a marketing campaign based around the tag line “The Sweetest Comeback in the History of Ever.”

And there was happiness and joy in the land. However, into our lives, some rain must fall, and fall it did.

With all the hype surrounding the relaunch has come an “unprecedented” demand for Twinkies, said Hostess spokeswoman Hannah Arnold, as orders continue to exceed production capacity “by a significant amount.” Some local retailers say that after the first shipment of Hostess products arrived in grocery and convenience stores across Pittsburgh last month, the supply line dried up.

It wasn’t just Pittsburgh. Up here near the Anger Central Data center, I found a supply and bought a few boxes. I never thought there would be a shortage or I would have stocked up. Obviously, others did and they took all my Twinkies and HoHo’s…the scum.

Although Hostess has received plenty of publicity that has helped revive interest in the Twinkies brand, the company’s efforts to keep the snack cakes on shelves are key to maintaining momentum. Mike Walsh, associate professor of marketing at West Virginia University, said product shortages can alienate consumers.

Just ask gun owners looking for ammunition. Why if they can’t get any, they will just stop using their guns and move on to bows and arrows…NOT! We have gone through a horrifying situation brought on by a pack of greedy unions. We will suffer, knowing that the light at the end of the tunnel is a glorious sugar high.

Now, after nearly a year without that wondrous golden, cream filled delicacy, we are being teased with news of shortages. I don’t blame the new maker of them, he has down great work bringing the Twinkies back, (With the help of NON-union employees). No, I blame Obama and the Democrats. They are the cause of so much that is wrong. Just look at how King Bloomberg handled the news when he heard that Hostess went under.

I can handle the shortages. After all, what else is there? These things?

Thank you

~The Angry Systems Administrator~

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