Good day all. I’m always on the look out for criminals who are just to stupid to be allowed to live. Unfortunately, we can’t just shoot them. The paperwork is horrendous. Still, stupid criminals do make it easier for everyone else.
For instance, we have one from a week ago. The favorite target for criminals, the pizza delivery guy, showed up with a pizza. The stupid criminal pulled out a loaded rifle magazine and threatened the driver. Yes, you read that correctly. Bozo the bonehead didn’t pull out a loaded rifle, just the magazine. Here are the amusing details from The Truth About Guns:
There’s not much to this story, but it’s so absurd that it needs to be on the record. Wednesday night in Rockford, Illinois, a man ordered a pizza from an unnamed restaurant. The non-customer then intercepted the delivery man in the parking lot, attempting to rob him…while pointing a loaded rifle magazine at him.
Needless to say, this tactic was ineffective.
The two men struggled briefly before the magazine-wielder ran off. The delivery man called police to file a report and did not suffer any injuries from the incident. The suspect is described as a 155-pound 5’8? black man in his 20s or 30s, wearing a black hooded sweatshirt and black pants.
Obviously, this criminal mastermind was following the Illinois laws regarding firearms. As a law abiding criminal, he felt that he couldn’t use an illegal gun, and had to make due with a magazine instead. However, it was probably one of those evil high capacity standard magazines that can hold a trillion rounds.
Frankly, this blockhead is lucky the delivery driver wasn’t carrying, or he would have been taking a ride in a hearse. If only more criminals could be this conscientiously stupid, we could clean up the streets in no time. Now if he had only posted his stupidity on Faceplant.
Thatisall
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~The Angry Webmaster~
